It's been a while. Hence this is long.

I've not posted since the eighth of April!   Very slack and I am most sorry. Many things have been happening, and mostly for the good. Firstly It was Ruths birthday, so we went to beaumaris for a bit of a stroll, and some light shopping, followed by the worlds most epic fudge coated birthday cake EVER. I made it all myself, and may have gone a bit over the top with the icing, as it was about an inch thick, and the cake was tall enough that it would have given a Tyranosaur gob strain, and so sweet, we could see through time by eating it.

Better than Stegosaur.

Also, The government seem to want me to be able to set up doing paining, and making things with pictures on them, for a living, which is great. So I'm working with an assembly funded scheme to egt things running... watch this space.

We went down to See our friends Steve, Pip, and their son Caleb a week or so ago too. Always a pleasure to visit them, even if the journey down did take about seven hours instead of three, as the weather was awful, and people drove like  they were holding the wheel with their mouthes, which is why they kept smashing into stuff. On saturday we went to the Marwell consevation park, where Steve is a teacher. I can see why he loves working there so much, the place is totally cool, and I advise you all to visit. They have posing porn lemurs.

We love you long time.

Inverted Amur Leopards, who just want a belly fuss, the teasing teasing ubermims.

There is the ultimate paff war, waiting to happen.

And Snow Leopards. Snow leopards are essentially dandelion clock that would rip your face off, if they could be bothered to get up and stop showing their delightful bellys.

Blow on my fluff, I dare you.

aw look, its aslee....ARGH MY FACE! MY BEAUTIFUL FACE!

Much fun was had. There were loads of other beasties, some of which looked delicious, which would explain their endangered status. However, the big cats, and the penguins were the highlights for me. May I also add, hippos smell. Really really smell. Like unwashed tramps underwear on a hot summers day, when they have been storing  cheddar in them to keep it safe from the mice.

Steve  and Pip have two cats. This pleases me. There is Loki, and Jones.

Loki.
A.K.A Doofus, Mr Mo, MoMo, Moki.
Appearance . take a normal sized cat head, and stick it on the body of a four legged dump truck. He is a goliath, like a furry AT-AT. He has jet black shiny fur, yellow eyes, a proud nose and seems to be made from play dough. May have claws, but is not sure what they are for. Squeaks like a mouse.
Demeanour Quite shy, but friendly once he is used to you, Likes to play fetch with balls of paper,  quite a chatty soul too, if you like little meeping noises. Fights a lot with Jones, when he is not trying to hump her, or laying in the sun.
Territory Anywhere the sun hits. * see below

I have spotted the rebels  shield generator.

Jones
A.K.A Mrs B, Bones, The ginger freak, Boobs.
Appearance Small, cute, snub nosed. Lovely silky soft marmalade fur, and pristine white trousers, Precious little white paws. More claws than a velociraptor. Doesn't purr but says "boof" to a lot of things. As yet undecided as to the meaning of "boof" Could be good, could mean death.
Demeanour Snooty  and timid, but can be fussed eventually, for about two seconds, then says "boof" and runs away. Savage ambush predator who bides her time after Loki's aborted humping attempts, the beats the living hell out of him. Entranced by cardboard tubes with paper sticking from them. Despises and yearns to eat all forms of life.
Territory The bed, Calebs window sill. Chair backs, fish tanks, sunny spots < contested with Loki>

"boof"

These two have a complex relationship, one that is beyond the knowing of humans, Obvious only to other cats, and even then, I think they'd end up on Jeremy Kyle < cat edition>


Tommorow I shall tell you what our  silly beasts have been up to. It involves tin foil hats, for a start.